Life is Waiting for You
Part 1 - How Do I Feel?
Disclaimer: Square owns all the characters but I have all the saved files on the memory card ^_^
If you haven’t read Fifth Avenue, please do, because this is a followup to that so it’s after the events 5th Ave.
<blah> - song lyrics
blah - thoughts of whoever is in POV
~~~ - POV swtich/change in group of charas in same scene (if any)
****** - flashback (if any)
OKAY GUYS. THIS STARTS THE FLASHBACK WHICH WILL CONTINUE THROUGH MOST OF THE PARTS UNTIL NEAR THE END.
Start Flashback: One year ago (some time after the events in Fifth Avenue)
Life is Waiting for You
Part 1 - How Do I Feel?
Squall wandered around the garden, trying to avoid Selphie’s avid attention. He had heard from several students that the hyper girl had been looking for him. Since the first person told him that afternoon, he’d been hiding in the shadows and slipping around, trying to avoid everyone so she wouldn’t get an idea as to where he was. As he kept moving from area to area, he felt like he was on a mission infiltrating a building. It was quite fun.
He’d even managed to hide from Seifer at one point, pissing the blonde off effectively. He ran into Seifer twice and finally revealed himself that second time, to which Seifer decided to hide with him for a while. They ended up getting stuck in the janitor’s closet at one point when Selphie called out for Squall around the corner. Seifer shoved the brunette in and they got stuck. That is, until Squall remembered that Cid had asked to see him five minutes earlier. Seifer ended up breaking down the door and both took off at a sprint before Selphie could arrive. Quistis and some cadets ended up fixing the door.
Now Squall was sneaking around trying to find the blonde man in question, but was having as hard a time as Seifer was earlier. As he walked by said closet, the door suddenly swung open and he was grabbed from behind, one hand holding him still around the middle and the other over his mouth
A low baritone voice whispered, “I have some questions for you and you are not leaving until they are answered.” With this said, the brunette was pulled into the blackness of the closet.
“AH! Stop that! AAAAAHahahahahaha!”
Quistis and Zell stopped in their tracks and looked at each other, then to the janitor’s closet to their right. They looked back at one another. Quistis frowned and Zell raised a confused eyebrow. They both turned slowly to the closet and crept close to it. Quistis counted to three silently and with her fingers and Zell pulled open the door. Amid the janitorial supplies, they found Seifer sitting on Squall, tickling him.
Quistis quirked an elegant eyebrow, as usual, and Zell pursed his lips together to keep from laughing. With the appearance of an audience, Squall turned a dark crimson and Seifer waved happily.
“What in the world are you doing?” Quistis asked with laughter in her voice.
“Hiding from Selphie.” Squall pushed the blonde off and stood.
“We can see that.” Zell grinned. “So what are we going to do when we get back to Esthar?”
“Well, I’m going back to work.” Seifer stretched and wrapped an arm around Squall.
“Same here, but I mean, are we gonna have ourselves a welcome back party at Fifth Avenue?” Zell put his hands in his pockets and fidgeted on one foot.
“Sure,” Seifer replied as Squall frowned. “What?”
“Did you hear that?” the brunette asked and everyone fell silent.
“Squall? Are you around here?” Selphie called from somewhere around the corner. He went completely pale.
“Oh crap! I gotta run.” Squall started to leave but Seifer held him back. He turned to the blonde and gave him what he wanted, his lips. Seifer wrapped his arms around the brunette’s small waist as Squall’s hands enveloped his rival’s cheeks.
<Go on, go on
Leave me breathless>
“I’ll see you later,” Squall said breathlessly as the kiss ended. “I promise.” He quickly slipped away around the opposite corner of Selphie without a sound.
Seifer stood staring dreamily for a moment then remembered that he too had to run. “Later guys!” He grinned and ran toward the elevator.
Selphie wandered past the corner as the elevator started its descent and she frowned at the two left behind. “Have you guys seen the ice man?”
“What?” Zell asked. “He’s not- ow!”
Quistis pulled her elbow away from Zell’s side and smiled. “We haven’t seen him. Maybe Seifer knows where he is.” She shrugged.
<The daylight’s fading slowly
but time with you is standing still
I’m waiting for you only
The slightest touch and I’ll feel weak>
Seifer sat at his desk gazing outside at the sunset. He smiled at the thought of the first time he actually sat down and enjoyed a sunset. It had been the time he took Squall out for a picnic. Squall’s hair shone brightly in the red light of the sunset.
<I cannot lie
From you I cannot hide
I'm losing the will to try
Can't hide it, can't fight it>
He smiled at the thought of his love, which he hoped soon to be his lover. The sun began to disappear behind a tree when Seifer sat back at stretched. He promised that I’d see him tonight. When will it be? He glanced at the clock. The digital read 9:29.
<Go on, go on, come on leave me breathless
Tempt me, tease me until I can't deny this
loving feeling, make me long for your kiss>
Seifer glared at the door. How long was the idiot gonna take? I wanna get back to what we started… He grinned goofily. It was the kind of grin he’d seen on Selphie’s face when Irvine said something sweet to her. He suddenly felt like a moron. I’m a guy! Why the hell am I making girly faces? The blonde stood to get a better view out the window. Oh yeah, I forgot, I’m in love.
<And if there's no tomorrow
And all we have is here and now
I'm happy just to have you
You're all the love I need somehow>
I’m glad I have you Squall. Unfortunately, it makes me act like a pussy. Seifer grinned again and turned from the window to go find the sneaky brunette. A knock rapped on the door and he stopped with a smile, and then frowned. What if it was Selphie? He stood stone still and glanced around for an escape. But what if it was Squall? Seifer could just imagine the man breaking down the door, worried to death.
<It's like a dream
Although I'm not asleep
I never want to wake up
Don't lose it, don’t leave me>
He chuckled at the thought.
“Seifer are you in there?!” Selphie shouted abruptly.
He froze. Crap!
“Have you seen Squall?” Zell’s voice followed hers.
“Are you sure he’s here?” Selphie asked.
“I thought he said he was going to his room.”
Seifer held his breath, wondering if Selphie could smell fear. He wished that Squall would appear and that the two would go after him.
<And I can't lie
From you I cannot hide
I've lost my will to try
Can't hide it, can’t fight it>
Man, I’ve totally got Squall on the brain. But, a new hobby would be boring. Seifer rubbed his face and sat on his desk chair as the two bickered outside as to what to do next.
<Go on, go on, come on leave me breathless
Tempt me, tease me until I can't deny this
loving feeling, make me long for your kiss>
Seifer sighed. He wanted to have Squall there, anywhere near. Then he could see him, or especially touch him. He rolled his eyes as Selphie mentioned Irvine. Would they be out there all night?
In the cafeteria, Squall was lounging comfortably, sipping on some cocoa, reading Selphie’s online diary on his laptop. She was griping about not being able to find the reading man in question, but was very optimistic about being able to find him and suspected him of avoiding her. Then she typed: nah! Squall just about spit out the cocoa he was drinking. She was too cute.
<Sometimes, I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear.
And I can't help but ask myself how much I'll let the fear take the wheel and steer>
He scrolled down and read more, actually finding her search path for the night. He made sure she wasn’t going to check the cafeteria again and logged off to check his email. His face wrinkled in a frown as he saw that he actually had email from someone other than Selphie and Quistis. They were from Seifer, and recently. All three were marked with the same subject: HELP ME.
A brown eyebrow raised and he clicked on the link. He smirked as he read Seifer’s explanation of his prison made by Selphie and Zell. Seifer expressed the fact that he wanted Squall to write back as soon as he got the messages or he would fill his mailbox with one of the same letters every half an hour.
Squall grinned and read the other two, which got more desperate each time. So, he wrote back: ‘I’d save you but I find that my cocoa is more appealing.’
He sent off the message and got an answer sooner than he thought. The subject title was: Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. And the message said: ‘You know damn well I taste better! Get your ass over here or I’ll spank it!’
Squall laughed out loud at the first sentence and turned red at the second
<It's driven me before, and it seems to have a vague, haunting mass appeal
But lately I am beginning to find out that I should be the one behind the wheel>
He wrote back: ‘I’m afraid of The Selphie.’
Seifer’s reply to this was: ‘So am I. Please save me my heroic knight, unless you're not as much of a knight as I am. You promised to come and see me.’
The brunette grinned and took another sip of his cocoa. He had promised, hadn’t he? Squall wondered what to write back. Usually he had a sarcastic quip, but now he was at a loss of words. Seifer remembered that he had promised. Does he really want me to go over there?
He replied: ‘I’ll be there soon.’
Seifer wrote back: ‘I love you.’
<Whatever tomorrow brings,
I'll be there with open arms and open eyes>
His breath stopped in his throat. Was he joking or for real? Squall didn’t know if they had come that far in their relationship. It had been a little over 4 months now though. Was that long enough to decide whether you loved someone? They didn’t really date, but went out with the group a lot. They only time they really spent alone was back at the mansion. They’d even almost gotten caught making out by Laguna. Squall grinned at this thought.
<So if I decide to waiver my chance to be one of the hive
Will I choose water over wine and hold my own and drive>
But did he love Seifer? Well, of course the answer was yes, but did Sefier really mean it? Squall looked at the screen again. ‘I LOVE YOU.’ His heart began to beat faster. His fingers guided themselves over the keys and hit the send button before his brain could stop them.
<It's driven me before and it seems to be the way that everyone else gets around
But lately I'm beginning to find that when I drive myself my light is found>
‘I love you too.’
I meant it, but why do I feel so scared? Squall shut down his laptop and folded the screen down as he thought. What was going to happen when he got to Seifer’s old room? Would Seifer expect him to say it out loud? Questions swirled through his mind as he wandered out of the cafeteria and through the hallways.
Will he ask me to spend the night? It’s not like Squall wouldn’t want to spend a night with Seifer. He’d been dreaming about that since before they claimed each other. But… he was nervous. I’ve never been with anyone before, or even loved anyone. I have no idea what to do in this relationship… He stopped at the dormitory sign before the entrance.
<Whatever tomorrow brings,
I'll be there with open arms and open eyes>
He sighed and looked up at the ceiling for an answer, but not finding one. What about when I dated Rinoa? Well, we didn’t even get to making out before we began to drift. Sadness filled Squall’s face. He felt bad for fooling himself that he could love Rinoa. But what about Seifer? All of a sudden, he felt nervous about being alone with his boyfriend. HIS boyfriend.
<Would you choose water over wine.... hold the wheel and drive?>
I can choose. If I don’t want to do something, he’ll understand. I hope.
Seifer dozed on his bed when he heard the click of the door. He opened a lazy eye to see a thin shadow in the corner. He watched silently as the darkness approached him and stepped into the dwindling evening light. Squall looked nervous and uncertain but beautiful all the same. His hair was tousled as usual but it gleamed pale in the lack of light and his eyes looked slightly puppy-dogish. The brunette gave a small smile then gazed out the window.
<There you are in a darkened room
And you're all alone looking out the window>
A smiled warmed Seifer’s face and he pulled on Squall’s pant leg, interrupting his love’s little reverie. Squall looked down at the hand still holding on to his pants, and then into Seifer’s eyes. His gray eyes looked clouded.
“Is there something wrong?” Seifer let his hand slide off of the black slacks.
“No, no. I’m cool.” The brunette sat down next to Seifer who sat up from his laying position. “Just distracted. You know I waited fifteen minutes outside for Selphie to finally give up waiting at your room to go check the library? She’s persistent. Even for the day before the festival.”
Seifer laughed. “Yeah, but I’m going to the festival tomorrow as an apology. Want to be my date?”
“Sure.” Squall’s face brightened and he chuckled. “You know I was thinking about climbing through your window.”
“I never thought of that,” the blond admitted as he wrapped his arms around Squall’s waist and leaned on his back. “Boy you're cold.”
“Yeah. I think I just have a lower body temperature than everyone else.” Squall put his hands on the arms around him, warming them against Seifer’s skin.
<Your heart is cold and lost the will to love
Like a broken arrow>
They stayed locked in the embrace for some time. The spell that had been weaved around them broke as they heard Selphie and Zell outside once again. Seifer stood from the bed silently and slipped toward the door to figure out what was going on. He leaned on the door and listened to their conversation. As the two decided to leave, Seifer looked back to the bed seeing his love sitting in the center of the bed, bathed in the soft moonlight. It made the breath catch in his throat.
<Here I stand in the shadows
Come to me, come to me, can't you see that
Nobody wants to be lonely, nobody wants to cry>
The scene was so beautiful that Seifer was frozen in place by the door. When Squall turned his attention from the floor to the shadowy man, it had an even more profound effect. His silvery eyes made Seifer’s heart stop and he melted. Squall saw the reaction and his eyes glimmered in satisfaction.
<My body's longing to hold you
So bad it hurts inside>
Squall cocked his head and his hair fell into perfect disarray around his face. He pulled off the black t-shirt he had on over a gray tanktop that showed his muscles quite well. Seifer stole toward the bed and kneeled on the floor in front of the brunette taking in all of his features, not wanting to forget one thing.
“You look so gorgeous,” Seifer told him. Squall looked down in modesty. “You don’t believe me?”
“Oh, trust me Seifer, I know you wouldn’t lie to me,” the brunette replied softly.
<Time is precious and it's slipping away
and I’ve been waiting for you all of my life>
Seifer leaned forward and nuzzled his love’s nose before capturing his soft lips. Squall seemed tense, but relaxed as they kissed. Two arms encircled Seifer’s neck as he pulled man he was kissing closer. Squall smiled when the kiss broke and pulled Seifer in to hold him. The blonde rested his head on the chiseled chest and sighed contented.
<Nobody wants to be lonely so why
why don't you let me love you>
Seifer turned his head up and began to drop hot kisses onto Squall’s cool neck. He heard his love gasp in pleasure and nibbled on the side of his neck. Hands wrapped around his skull to keep it in place as Squall lay back on the bed. Seifer crawled onto the bed and over Squall, still attached to his neck.
“You taste so sweet.” Seifer blew on Squall’s wet neck to get a shiver out of the boy.
<Can you hear my voice; do you hear my song?
It's a serenade, so your heart can find me>
Squall glared at him. “Finish what you started,” he demanded breathing heavily.
“My, aren’t we pushy tonight.” Seifer captured the brunette’s lips, still holding himself up off of Squall’s body. Squall didn’t seem to like that and pulled him down to rest their bodies against one another.
The blonde pulled his head back and looked at Squall. He could tell Squall wanted to go farther, but his eyes still seemed uncertain. Seifer took notice to something poking his thigh and grinned. As he noticed, Squall turned a deep crimson, clear even in the pale moonlight.
<And suddenly your flying down the stairs
into my arms baby>
Squall then raised an eyebrow and pushed his own thigh against Seifer’s erection. He also leaned up and began to nibble on Seifer’s ear. The blonde shuttered and reveled in the feelings Squall gave him. Seifer’s hand wandered under Squall’s tank and the brunette stopped his attack on the blonde’s ear and kissed his neck once.
<Before I start going crazy
Run to me run to me, cause I'm dying>
Seifer pulled his hand back and laid it on the bed. He saw fear in Squall’s innocent eyes. “Do you want to stop?”
Indecision and confusion clouded those stormy eyes as Squall thought. “I don’t want to but…” he trailed off, unsure.
<I want to feel you deeply
just like the air you're breathing>
“I don’t know.” Squall stared into Seifer’s blue. It was the truth; he really didn’t know what he wanted. Seifer rolled over to his side, leaning on one arm and draping the other over Squall’s stomach.
“Would you like a backrub?” Seifer asked as he played with the edge of Squall’s tank. “It gives your body and my hands a chance to get acquainted.”
The gray-eyed man thought on this and sat up. “Do I have to take my tank top off?” he asked.
Seifer shrugged. “As long as you're comfortable sweets.” He gave Squall a peck on the lips, which seemed to give the brunette confidence.
<I need you here in my life
don't walk away don't walk away>
Squall pulled the shirt over his head and tossed it onto the floor. He turned around and lay stomach down on the bed.
“Don’t worry.” Seifer patted Squall’s ass and kneeled, his legs on either side of it. “I owe you one anyway.”
<Nobody wants to be lonely
Nobody wants to cry>
Seifer’s hands began to knead the shoulders in front of him. As his palms worked about the back, Squall began to relax more and more. The blonde was just glad he was able to touch the soft pale skin. It was practically begging him to anyway.
<My body's longing to hold you
It’s longing to hold you, so bad it hurts inside>
As Seifer’s hands began to get sore, he let up on the massage and began to trail his fingers around Squall’s back. This made the brunette sigh in pleasure.
He chuckled. “If you don’t stop, I might have to leave to prevent myself from jumping you.”
“Who says I’d let you leave?” Seifer lay next to Squall and the brunette turned onto his side with a smile.
<Time is precious and it's slipping away
and I’ve been waiting for you all of my life>
“Thanks. I needed that.” Squall kissed the blonde.
“No problem, love.” Seifer hugged him
“Did you really mean that when you wrote it on the computer?” Squall asked.
“Of course.”
“Then, so do I.”
<Nobody wants to be lonely so why
why don't you let me love you>
Seifer hugged the pale body to his. “I love you. You know that.”
“Yeah, but we never said it out loud before.” Squall sat up and reached for his top.
The blonde grabbed his arm. “You aren’t staying?” Emotions fluttered over Squall’s face as he tried to think of what to say in response. Seifer gave him an affectionate look. “Just sleep with me tonight? I’ll be so lonely without you, love.”
“I wouldn’t leave you for anything.”
Seifer smiled and yawned. “Good. We better get to bed if we want to be awake enough to avoid Selphie in the morning and be awake for the festival tomorrow night.”
“Yeah,” Squall nodded. He stood and pulled his blue jeans off as Seifer did the same with the rest of his clothes, leaving them in their respective boxers.
Under the covers, Squall was pulled into protective arms. He nuzzled Seifer’s chest as he drifted toward sleep. “Seifer?” he asked as he began to doze.
“Hmm?”
“Love you too.”
Squall didn’t feel the kiss placed on his silky hair, but then again, it didn’t matter. He knew Seifer loved him always.
* * *
*bounces around* you guys likie?! Im so happy! C&C please!!
~Elise Maxwell~
Songs Used: Breathless by The Corrs, Drive by Incubus, and Nobody Wants to be Lonely by Ricky Martin.
I own none of these songs; they belong to their respective writers and singers.